Dysfunction is a special word we reserve for things which consistently fail to operate according to their design. We call a paper-making machine dysfunctional when it starts spitting out gooseberry muffins instead of paper, we call a non-stick pan dysfunctional when it starts resisting our efforts to capsize an over-easy egg on its surface. ... Continue Reading →
Towards Economical Writing: A Pseudo Pundit’s Guide to Prudent Prose
The prudent writer will attempt to restrain his spending habits somewhere between Ebenezer Scrooge and Kim Kardashian. On the one hand, such a writer fears (rightly) any method which - in language or form - might indicate a dearth of supply. He will guiltlessly pursue good literature; he will use his thesaurus with reckless abandon;... Continue Reading →
Who’s In Charge Here? The Intolerable Burden Expected Of Youth
“It is never a good sign when adults defer to children and when an angry placard becomes a manifesto for government.” - The Telegraph After a sustained bought of expensive repairs, my daughter recently advised me to buy a new vehicle. Though appreciative of her desire to contribute, my eagerness to act on her advice... Continue Reading →
Drag Kids and a Heap of Millstones
The most tragic forty-five minutes in history has just been aired on Canada’s main broadcasting network. It’s called Drag Kids, and it claims to be “a daring and touching portrait of four kids chasing freedom and friendship through the art of drag.” Though couched in terms which suggest an epic quest, the aforementioned “portrait” essentially... Continue Reading →
Humanity Among the Tents
There is always the danger of dehumanization on behalf of those urging the immediate eviction of the homeless in Victoria Park. This approach, equally selfish and irresponsible, considers the best response to social “problems” is to shuffle them into a soundproof cupboard. However, I believe an equal, if more subtle, dehumanity may still be hard... Continue Reading →
A Grief Deferred: How Sadness Wounds and Heals
I am averse to sadness in all its forms. Though I believe this aversion derives partly from nurture, I must own at least a full two-thirds as a product of nature - a nature inescapably shaped by the time and place in which I live. Even having the option of avoiding sadness betrays my status... Continue Reading →
An Open Letter to Maryam Monsef
Dear Maryam Monsef, There are a few things in your response to conservative MP’s recent “unacceptable” involvement in pro-life activities that I would like to address. The first is your claim that our nation’s views on abortion have “long been decided”, and that this supposed heritage status preemptively disqualifies any further attempts at discussion. May... Continue Reading →
A Subcreator’s Manifesto
That there is within man an inherent desire to to create is undeniable - one only needs to witness a child with a box of lego or an adult with a restaurant napkin to confirm this fact. The problem is that our natural impulses, along with everything else in the world, are not clean, shiny,... Continue Reading →
A Newfie, an Entomologist, and an Evangelical Walk into a Bar. . .
Though this might sound like the start of a bad joke (or a good one, depending how deep you are in the trenches of fatherhood), I recently bumped upon a living amalgamation of all three (well to be fair, he died about a hundred years ago.) This discovery was made possible through the uncanny literary... Continue Reading →
